Dear KFC Australia,
My 11-year-old son and I could before now hardly be described as fans of your, um, food – I mean, we find it difficult to picture what someone who wants to win a year’s worth of KFC would actually look like.
But nor have we been antagonistic – ambivalent or apathetic would be closer to the mark.
Now we detest your company and its greasy products.
You see, what we are fans of is sport – which is why we indulge in the affordable luxury of pay TV.
At this time of year, when there’s not much going on, we’re definitely up for watching a bit of T20 cricket, the domestic competition of which has provided us with much viewing pleasure in previous years.
This year, though, that enjoyment has been severely lessened by the rampant repetition of KFC adverts – on and on and on and on ….
Worse, this year they feature the Madden brothers, a couple of charmless US rock “stars” of a band so hot most Australians have never heard of it and are probably glad that that’s the case.
Worse again, the pair have been involved in vegetarianism and animal rights in the past, although you guys seem to be confused about that according to the website Umbrella.
It’s all very confusing, not to mention profoundly irritating.
I mean, do you really think showcasing a couple of, ahem, animal rights activists, or at the very least sympathisers, in your ads is a winner in terms of marketing?
Especially when it comes across very clearly they’re in it just for the money and it’s also very noticeable they are not shown at any point in the act of consuming your products?
Whose idea was it to employ these has-beens?
But then again, we are pretty much out of the loop when it comes to corporate marketing and branding.
So for all we know getting a reaction such as this letter from disgusted punters could have your PR and marketing types wildly high-fiving.
But the fact remains – we now hate your “food” and we hate you.